When the Waiting Ends
If you have been in a group of Christian girls, you may have heard the concept of “True Love Waits.” Many girls dedicate themselves, not only to staying physically pure before their wedding night, but also to wait and pray that the Lord would pick their husband and write for them a marvelous love story.
What does a God written love story look like? There is an over abundance of stories that portray two people who were willing to earnestly give this part of their lives unto the Lord, and of how He proved Himself faithful - giving them a true, pure love story that they could have never imagined on their own. And the best part? By these couples who were willing to lay this most precious part of their lives down at His feet, it brought an abundance of glory and honor to Jesus Christ, our Savior.
I myself have come from a large group of girls who desired such a God-written love story. Each of us were firmly determined that no matter what the case, or how long the wait, we would let our Savior and King rule over this precious part of our lives.
But for many, the wait was to long…
Since that time in my mid-to-late teens, I have watched as many of these girls became discouraged and slowly veered away from letting Jesus be the Lord over this area of their lives. I do not scorn these girls or mean to judge or disgrace them in any way. Waiting and trusting, when it seems as though all other friends are getting married, is very difficult, and it is even more difficult when a certain man has caught a girl’s special attention.
From my own experience, the hardest part of the waiting process has come when a man expressed an interest, or, at least, showed an interest in me. And yet… that still small voice in my heart would say, “Not yet,” or “Not this one.” Oh how easy it would have been for me to push that tiny voice aside! It was such a faint whisper, I could have proceeded but I still would have heard, “Not yet, he’s not the one.” Oh to know what it’s like to have a boyfriend! To have someone with whom I could share mutual affections with! How wonderful that must be! Yes, I can see quite clearly just how easy it would be to ignore that small inner warning and to say “Yes,” to someone I wanted.
So why wait? Our culture tells us to try our relationships in all aspects and that multiple boyfriends is a good thing. But it doesn’t take a very in-depth look to see that this simply is not a good approach. It may be fun at the time, but the shattered hearts and broken lives that such relationships leave behind is sickening. But what other choice is there? How can a girl find a husband without dating?! Pray, and listen for that still small voice - it is far more trustworthy than fickle feelings and emotions.
I have observed many girls who have chosen not to listen to that still, small voice and who have instead chosen to be led by their own deceitful hearts instead of by the strength of the Lord. Many are driven by loneliness, which is something that I too have struggled deeply with, but as much as girls would like to believe that a boyfriend or marriage would fix that, it’s simply not the case.
I have closely observed the relationships of those girls who gave it all to the Lord and of those who gave up the fight and decided to follow their own emotions. The difference is these two groups of girls and their relationships is astounding. The girls who have whole-heartedly given their love stories to the Lord are eventually blessed with a relationship that is joyfully accepted by friends and family, and that draws each of the them closer to the Lord.
As for the girls that have given up waiting, there is often talk by friends or family who disapprove or feel un-easy about the relationship. Such relationships tend to be self-focused, lustful, hasty and rash, and more than anything else - blind to all of those things! This type of relationship is where the term “Love is blind,” comes from, for the two people involved have become blind and often refuse to even acknowledge the wise counsel of those around them. Such people begin to surround themselves with un-Godly friends who support their relationship instead of the strong Godly influences that they had once respected.
The difference in the married life in these two different groups is also astonishing. The marriages of those who before marriage gave their emotions and desires to the Lord, vs. those who were driven by their emotions and desires throughout their relationship are nearly opposite. No marriage is perfect - but I am inspired the most by those who chose to wait and pray!
Being as I am in my early 20’s, I freely admit that often times it is hard to wait any longer! And yet, the older I get, the more girls I see fall away from waiting on the Lord, choosing a different path and I have also clearly seen where it leads.
I will choose to listen to the One who knows what is best for my life and trust that He will make all things clear to me in His perfect timing.
I still chose to wait. I have written this with many prayers that it will help those singles who read it to be encouraged to do the same.
Will you wait with me?