Boys!

“BOYS!” 

 Rather catching title for a girl’s Blog, don’t you think? 

(Admit it. It caught your attention!)

It would be impossible for me to even try to count the many times I have been in a circle of girls, when suddenly, one of them randomly exclaims,  “Oh! Did you see that boy that just went past? He is simply the CUTEST thing I have ever seen!  Oh look! I think he‘s smiling at me! He must like me!”  

Photo Courtesy

You yourself may have not heard these exact words before, but being a girl, I’m sure you’ve heard something similar a multitude of times!  Perhaps, you are yourself are just a bit “boy crazy.”  


Now I’m not out to say that boys are gross and ugly and that any girl who likes them must be out of her head.  God made boys and girls to be attracted to each other, it is not a wrong, but is being “boy crazy” really just something that  happens to every girl and can’t be stopped or is it a learned habit that can actually be dangerous?  (And that’s where I lost all my boy crazy readers. ;)  )  


Just think about it, ladies, do you notice every cute guy that passes you on the street?  Do you perhaps dream of this one or that one - constantly switching your affections from one to another?  From what I’ve discovered, most girls today can’t even begin to count the number of crushes that they have had in their lifetimes.  (Some can’t even count the number of boyfriends!)  
Now imagine girls… Prince Charming finally arrives! He is the perfect one! He sweeps you off your feet, carries you away and gives you the wedding of your dreams!  Happily ever after has begun! ….. Or has it?  You now have your prince, you can now focus all of your attention and emotions on him… That is, until the cute guy walking past winks at you.  

Photo Courtesy

From my talks with other girls, I have discovered that there seems to be this unrealistic expectation that once a girl is married, the habit of noticing other cute guys and forming crushes on them with simply vanish.  Quite honestly, nothing could be farther from the truth!   Being boy crazy may seem like a harmless little thing that happens to every girl, but in truth, it simply trains girls to notice and form strong emotional attachments to a multitude of young men.  This process does not stop after a girl gets married either!  Statistics show that divorce and adultery is now almost as high, or even higher, in those who claim to be Christians as it is in the non-Christian world.  One huge reason for this is the belief that being boy crazy is simply innocent and can’t be helped.  The truth is it can be helped dramatically and by not working towards taming emotions, girls are simply training themselves for unfaithfulness to their husbands someday.  


My sister and I use the phrase, “We crush our crushes,” meaning, as soon as we begin to form an attachment, or a crush on some guy, we immediately work hard to put our focus else where.  (Or we crush it! Haha!  … Ok, ok, lame joke)  
Books (Non-romance), sewing, music, studying, or volunteer work are just a few great and productive things to re-focus attention onto.  Is fighting the “crush syndrome” difficult?  YES! Absolutely! I’m not here to deny that!  It is hard, but it is also very possible and very productive.  Instead of training one’s mind to notice every cute boy, it teaches self-control, diligence, and patience.  Working to keep a heart away from frivolous crushes will only train for faithfulness in marriage.  


Marriage is the biggest decision most of us will ever have to make in our lives.  We work hard for an education, study for this or that, but when it comes to this critical part of a persons life, most just follow their frivolous and ever changing emotions.  That is not a good foundation.  A good marriage begins now, and the earlier you begin to work on it, the more successful you are likely to be.  No one wants a bad miserable marriage, then why do so many of us train ourselves to be unfaithful?  If we chose instead to focus our eyes upon the Lord, instead of who our future prince charming could possibly be, we will be greatly blessed.  The Lord is ever faithful and will over abundantly bless those who chose to trust in Him. 


Crushes… Harmless and innocent or training for disaster?


~ Missy